Living Vicariously
June 12, 2004 | 
18 Comments
I’m not down with living vicariously.
What does living vicariously mean exactly? Well, the word vicariously is commonly defined as:
Indirectly, as, by, or through a substitute, so let’s go with; living though someone else’s experiences.
What I feel that really means is is:
You, sitting around with your thumb up your ass, watching everyone else have all the fun.
I don’t want to be the person that “lives vicariously” though a friend who is off to Timbuktu. I want to go to Timbuktu too! Living life on the sidelines just isn’t in my nature, I need to get out there, meet people, do things, take risks — live life.
Living vicariously isn’t exactly living if you think about it.
I’ve never understood people who were content to sit back and watch. I see quite a bit of similarity between vicarious living and reality television. I don’t get most of that either.
When they’re asked, many people come up with all sorts of excuses for living vicariously through others, but I think it usually comes down to fear or lack of effort. Sure, there are other reasons. One could have physical, emotional or financial limitations, which are all understandable.
The problem, as I see it, is that I know far too many people who don’t do something, and therefore opt to live vicariously or sit back and watch, because they have decided (yes, simply made a choice) that they can’t do something.
As my mom always said, “Can’t never did anything.” It’s true.
I’m not trying to tell anyone how to live, just putting forth that I don’t understand why people choose to go through life not doing. To each his own I guess.
Anyway — another common excuse (yes, excuse again) for living vicariously is age or, it seems more commonly, maturity. I guess what people feel is that they’re too old to do something they feel is “crazy”, “silly” or “stupid”.
The problem with this method of thinking is that “crazy”, “silly” and “stupid” often times equal “fun”.
Since I’m not down with living vicariously does this mean I’m out there all the time acting crazy, silly and stupid?
Well, not all the time… ;)
But guess what? I have fun when I get crazy, act silly or even many times when I do something stupid. All those terms are subjective anyway. I mean what you think is stupid I might consider exciting.
You’re never too old to have fun and life is too damn short not to try and enjoy every last minute of it.
With that, I’m off to celebrate getting one year older (yep, today is my birthday! You can have a look at my Amazon Wish List if your feeling generous) by doing something crazy, silly and probably stupid. For all those who love living vicariously, I’ll tell you all about it later…If you’re lucky.
Filed under: Life and Such
Comments
1. David Barrett said:
Happy birthday Keith. How old are you now?
I’ve also seen this crap about maturity. How boring is life if you just stick to what is considered mature? Where would all your interesting stories come from?
Posted on June 12, 2004 06:06 PM | #
2. Jason Marble said:
…Naked ladies on channel 80… Happy birthday bro.
I know what you mean man. Wednsday I asked my buddy to go down to mexico to surf for a few days at K-38. His reply was, “no I’m just gonna (sit on my ass and ) watch the lakers game and take my gf out to dinner.” F*ck’n p*ss. He also backed out of a trip abroad I took this winter for 3.5 months, which was kick ass besides the debt it gave me. Anyways, I charged down to mex with another friend I can always relly on for a random trip. The waves were sweet. We stayed for 3 nights, partyed in rosarito friday night, and headed home this morning.
Yea we’re still young, but still, life is all about having fun, even if your 80. I don’t want to die knowing I missed out on something.
Posted on June 12, 2004 08:01 PM | #
3. Scott C. Reynolds said:
Happy birthday man. You’re absolutely right.
Posted on June 12, 2004 09:45 PM | #
4. alana rivera said:
At five days ahead of me, I have been thinking similar thinks this past week. Good call and good post. I appreciate it muchly (she says from China, having been doing that rather big something stupid for 4 years).
Posted on June 12, 2004 11:41 PM | #
5. Irfandhy Franciscus said:
Hi,
You may not know me, but I have been reading your blog for quite some time. I learn quite a lot from your blog.
Happy B’day ^____^
Posted on June 12, 2004 11:43 PM | #
6. Johan Svensson said:
As my friend put it: “I’m a minor supporting actor in the movie about someone else’s life.”
I know exactly what he meant.
Oh, and happy birthday.
Posted on June 13, 2004 04:29 AM | #
7. Michael Watts said:
Happy Birthday :)
Posted on June 13, 2004 04:35 AM | #
8. Gambit said:
Happy b-day, mine is in 5 days time. True is we only live once and it is never to late to begn and adventure. If we always do the same things we will always have the same things and nothing will ever change. Take chances and have fun
Posted on June 13, 2004 05:48 AM | #
9. Keith said:
Thanks for all the well wishes y’all – I really, really appreciate it!
Posted on June 13, 2004 03:06 PM | #
10. Todd said:
A little late to the pary here…Happy birthday Keith! Here’s to many more.
Posted on June 13, 2004 04:57 PM | #
11. Jason Santa Maria said:
Holy Hell, when did they come out with The Storyteller Collection?! I loved that show. Happy birthday my good man, if I meet you face to face someday, I will take you over my knee and give you some belated spankings to celebrate.
Posted on June 13, 2004 08:35 PM | #
12. s t e f said:
Damn, I’m a bit late, but happy birthday man.
That’s only at the end of the post that I realised that it had to do with getting older.
Actually I decided to make all I could with my life when I was thirty.
My wife had gone away nearly two years earlier (so she was two years older than me, for the math majors reading this), and when she left she had said: “I’m thirty. Now I want to have fun, have kids, and not with you. Now I’ve got no more time left to wait, I must act.”
Although at the moment the splitup was of course painful, although partially expected, she was right and I’m grateful to her.
Two yars after that I turned thirty, and remembered what she had said. And boy was she right.
I dropped my job (boring civil service), left my place, went up to Paris and began working on the web.
I never regretted it. Try this at home kids :)
Posted on June 14, 2004 05:48 AM | #
13. Paul G said:
Happy B-day, Keith!
I think you’re definitely right, you can’t spend life on the sidelines. And people wondered why I went to Japan for no apparent reason. Heck, no reason is the best reason. As Calvin said: “I must obey the inscrutable exhortations of my soul.”
Now, instead of asking me what ever posessed me to go to Japan on a whim, everyone asks, “What was it like?”, usually followed by “Wow, I wish I could travel like that.”
Posted on June 14, 2004 06:21 AM | #
14. anonymous said:
“No Jules, you’re gonna be like those pieces of s**t out there who beg for change. They walk around like a bunch of f**kin’ zombies, they sleep in garbage bins, they eat what I throw away, and dogs piss on ‘em. They got a word for ‘em, they’re called bums. And without a job, residence, or legal tender, that’s what you’re gonna be – a f**kin’ bum!”
Posted on June 14, 2004 06:25 AM | #
15. jake said:
Happy Belated Birthday.
I do know exactly what you mean, but I have found that being vicarious has its benefits. Mostly when it involves drugs.
I’ve never been a very judgmental person so over the years I’ve met many random people in random situations. But by being observant I have some closer to home experiences than just watching things on TV. I’ve met people who’ve dont stupid things and regretted it later, so now I don’t have to. ;)
But when it comes to the real meaning of this post I agree wholeheartedly. You can’t just sit on the sidelines and sleep through life. Though I should practice what I preach a little more.
Posted on June 14, 2004 10:53 AM | #
16. Keith said:
Thanks again for all the well wishes. Even the belated ones! ;)
Jake – it’s funny how a few people thought “drugs” with this. Not my intention, although I won’t tell anyone how to interpret this post. Fun means different things to different people.
I don’t do drugs of any kind, and I never really have. Just not my thing at all. I’ve been known to throw back my share of Taquila and such, but that’s about it.
But like you – I don’t judge. Just speaking for myself here.
Thanks again….
Posted on June 14, 2004 11:19 AM | #
17. Justin said:
Happy birthday!
Posted on June 14, 2004 11:27 AM | #
18. Derek Lamar said:
Well I understand what you are saying… and fun is different for different people, as you say, but one must also observe the Self and be in touch with who you are to actually KNOW the difference between “having fun” and using some inane activity to escape looking at oneself. Take a look at my newspaper column, Mystical Journey, and you will see what I mean. But then I am not a kid anymore. zzzzzzzzzzzzz Good luck and happy birthday, Derek Lamar
Posted on October 14, 2005 09:39 AM | #
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